Authenticity

Oof.

 

Boyfriend and I had to have a difficult talk. The kind of talk that is bound to leave at least one person feeling like they have been kicked in the stomach. I am the one that wound up doubled over this time.

But.

I am a girl who, when she says she genuinely wants to know what someone honestly thinks, means it, and means it big time. I don’t want to be placated, and sugarcoated information just leaves me with a stomachache. If left to my own devices, I will imagine worst-case scenarios, and the truth is often less painful than the anxiety-fueled horrors I can dream up in my head.

That wasn’t the case this time, unfortunately. This time, the truth totally sucked.

Continue reading →

On a Lark

 

Several years ago, I realized that engaging in grown-up life left me with no extra energy to spend on tip-toeing around difficult subjects, or in pretending to be something that I am not. I started moving toward more straightforward and genuine interactions with people whenever possible.

And that was when most of my friends discovered that I am a seventy-year-old woman trapped in a mid-thirties body.

I am most centered, and most alert, at the start of the day, and since I’ve always been an early riser this works to my benefit. I have no problem getting up while it is still dark out. I cherish the first quiet hours of the day, when everyone else is still asleep. I get more work done in the two hours before my co-workers arrive than I do in the six hours we then spend in the office together.

Continue reading →